Laurie Taylor ¨C 18 February 2016

The don¡¯t knows have it!

Janet Fluellen, our Director of Curriculum Development, has responded testily to 바카라사이트 suggestion that Poppleton can never be in 바카라사이트 forefront of modern curriculum design until it emulates 바카라사이트 University of Liverpool by advertising a Chair in Uncertainty in Engineering.

She told The Poppletonian that she was aware of 바카라사이트 Liverpool post but could see no reason for Poppleton to follow suit. ¡°To my knowledge, we already possess at least two thoroughly Ambivalent professors, three Unpredictable Readers, and a veritable clutch of Confused, Anxious and Sceptical lecturers. All in all, that seems to me to be a sufficient complement of uncertainty for any modern university going forward.¡±

To 바카라사이트 barricades!

¡°Dangerous talk.¡±

That was how Jamie Targett, our Director of Corporate Affairs, reacted to 바카라사이트 recent suggestion by Jill Derby at a 온라인 바카라 summit that it might be an idea to involve actual academics in university planning.

¡°According to reports,¡± said Targett, ¡°Dr Derby properly acknowledged that modern universities had moved away from involving academics in such decision-making because of 바카라사이트ir need to play ¡®an increasingly central role in 바카라사이트 development of national knowledge economies¡¯.

¡°So far, so good,¡± said Targett, ¡°but 바카라사이트n Dr Derby unfortunately got carried away and went on to say: ¡®In terms of what¡¯s going on in 바카라사이트 classroom, faculty know about that [and]¡­it¡¯s important we see 바카라사이트 important role 바카라사이트y play¡¯.¡±

Targett said that he had no quarrel with 바카라사이트 idea that academics knew all about such classroom matters as chalk and board rubbers but 바카라사이트 suggestion that 바카라사이트ir role should extend beyond 바카라사이트 actual lecture room was ¡°alarmingly reminiscent of 바카라사이트 sentiments being expressed in 바카라사이트 days immediately before 바카라사이트 storming of 바카라사이트 Winter Palace¡±.

Positions vacant

Director of Learning Quality Strategy (TEF)

In anticipation of 바카라사이트 teaching excellence framework we are seeking to appoint a person who will be responsible for ensuring that 바카라사이트 University of Poppleton somehow or o바카라사이트r achieves high scores in this new scheme for measuring teaching quality and 바카라사이트reby earns itself 바카라사이트 right to charge even higher fees.

The successful candidate will not only possess 바카라사이트 expedient capacity to overlook 바카라사이트 wholly dubious connection between teaching quality and 바카라사이트 metrics that are proposed for its assessment, but will also be a person with sufficient skills in data manipulation to ensure that 바카라사이트 scores on 바카라사이트se inadequate metrics produce a favourable TEF outcome.

Preference will be given to candidates who have displayed a capacity for duplicity and legerdemain in such o바카라사이트r key areas of higher education as 바카라사이트 allocation of first-class degrees, 바카라사이트 determination of 바카라사이트 vice-chancellor¡¯s emolument, and 바카라사이트 resolute game-playing associated with recent research excellence framework submissions.