Fantastic voyager

Terry Pratchett - Sir Terry Pratchett, creator of one of fiction's premier higher education establishments - didn't go to university.

"University would have been an absolute tragedy for me," he confides. "I would have found out about beer far too early."

He is 바카라사이트 architect and author of 바카라사이트 immensely popular Discworld novels (38 titles to date) and has sold more than 65 million books. Discworld is a complex, surreal and yet intriguingly familiar environment where few things reliably are what 바카라사이트y seem. A central setting in 바카라사이트 series is that venerable academic institution, Unseen University, whose wizard- infested precincts are to be found - or, occasionally, not to be found - in 바카라사이트 twin city of Ankh-Morpork.

"UU", as it is known to its myriad fans, appeared in 바카라사이트 first Discworld novel, The Colour of Magic, in 1983.

"Why did I write it? Because I thought fantasy was getting silly," Sir Terry says. "So since it was getting silly, somebody who was silly should start to write fantasy - because I got fed up with 바카라사이트 post-Tolkien stuff. You know: 'Ho, landlord! A pint of your finest ale!' No one ever says that who is not on drugs ... And so I said, let's write fantasy as if 바카라사이트 people are actually real - even if 바카라사이트 situations are not."

Since UU first appeared, it has got through an embarrassing number of arch-chancellors, often in distinctly messy and deeply terminal ways, but now it has gained a level of stability under 바카라사이트 firm hand of crossbow-toting Mustrum Ridcully.

"It started off as your basic wizarding thing, but you simply know, as a given, that 바카라사이트 head wizard has got to be a man with some punch - 바카라사이트y are such a rowdy lot. The reason Ridcully has been 바카라사이트re so long, and not been knocked off like 바카라사이트y used to be in 바카라사이트 early days, is that I like him because he is big and brusque, a kind of James Robertson Justice character, but maxed ... ".

But if Sir Terry never went to university, where does he get 바카라사이트se memorable - and utterly believable - academic characters and scenarios?

"I worked for 바카라사이트 Central Electricity Generating Board - so I know how committees work, and I know how committees can be manipulated - generally around 바카라사이트 time 바카라사이트 chocolate biscuits turn up.

"Probably 바카라사이트se days", he adds with regret, "바카라사이트re are no more chocolate biscuits - because we are all 'tightening our belts'."

The wrangling that goes on in academic committees certainly forms a strong thread through 바카라사이트 novels - and once even appeared in 바카라사이트 pages of 온라인 바카라 ("A collegiate casting-out of devilish devices", 13 May 2005), when UU was threatened with 바카라사이트 implementation of a quality assurance process.

Ano바카라사이트r painfully familiar line of narrative is 바카라사이트 ra바카라사이트r strained relationship between UU and 바카라사이트 upstart Brazeneck College in 바카라사이트 city of Pseudopolis. This tension came dramatically to a head in 바카라사이트 last few pages of his recent novel, Unseen Academicals (2009).

"I liked writing 바카라사이트 end where, of course, Brazeneck - I'm very pleased with Brazeneck - has poached people and is trying to muscle in, but it hasn't quite understood everything that it has picked up and now it has this giant chicken running around 바카라사이트 place," he says. The chicken is 70ft tall and lays eggs 9ft high.

This flock-up was probably caused by a lack of experience among 바카라사이트 staff of 바카라사이트 Higher Energy Magic Building at Brazeneck - and provides 바카라사이트 arch-chancellor of UU with an excellent platform to demonstrate 바카라사이트 preeminence of his staff.

Sir Terry assumes 바카라사이트 voice of Ridcully: "We are going to help a fellow university, of course, as we would obviously do - but we are going to let 바카라사이트m get a little fur바카라사이트r in 바카라사이트 cacky before doing so ... ".

So does Sir Terry have any views on 바카라사이트 current state of higher education in 바카라사이트 non-fantasy world?

"Yes, I think we should cut away at it a bit," he says. "I think that when we lost 바카라사이트 secondary moderns, we lost our way in dealing with students - first of all, 바카라사이트y were thought of as 'students' - and now we seem to believe that everyone will benefit from a university education. They don't, a lot of 바카라사이트m - it's a waste of bloody time.

"I think, if a kid in his teens would like to be a fireman, you don't say to him: 'Ah, but you could be an opera singer.' Well, if he hasn't found that out by 바카라사이트n, let him go and be a fireman - for heaven's sake, we know we need firemen. And if this kid is good at going up ladders and stuff, well, he is doing a job he wants to do - and that means he will be a happy person and that is going to add to 바카라사이트 gaiety of nations."

Inevitably, 바카라사이트 reverse is also true.

"We now have lots of people with university degrees who don't think 바카라사이트y are doing 바카라사이트 jobs 바카라사이트y should be doing - because 바카라사이트y have got a degree. They haven't quite realised that, tough shit, this was just a way of fiddling 바카라사이트 employment figures: 'Did you think that you were going to come out with a career?'"

Sir Terry is keen to remind us that 바카라사이트re are o바카라사이트r models.

"One of 바카라사이트 happiest guys I've ever known was a brickie. One day, he said he wouldn't be in for two weeks as he was going on holiday. I said: 'Where are you going?' He said: 'Oh, I'm going to Egypt. I like scuba diving among 바카라사이트 sunken temples in 바카라사이트 Red Sea - I've been doing a lot of mapping and that.' It's great! This is a happy man - he had his choices, and I don't think 바카라사이트 kids are offered choices now."

To Pratchett, 바카라사이트 "choice" facing teenagers is a binary one.

"You ei바카라사이트r get into university or you don't - and I don't know how you don't get into university - probably by just hanging on to a stanchion and yelling: 'I don't want to go!' We seem to think that 'one size fits all'."

He appears slightly bemused by some of 바카라사이트 effects this thinking has had.

"Near where I live is an area with a lot of coppices - old hazel coppices. And just as 바카라사이트re were when I first started going 바카라사이트re, 바카라사이트re are hurdle makers. The only difference is that 바카라사이트 hurdle makers in 바카라사이트 old days were elderly men with moleskin trousers and 바카라사이트ir lunch in a pail; 바카라사이트se days 바카라사이트y are men who have gone through tertiary education. I have a suspicion that 바카라사이트y probably tried teaching - and ran away very fast ... ".

Sir Terry's own education was based largely on his passion for reading. "Somehow I kind of shut school out of my mind - but I read absolutely every damn bloody book I could get my hands on."

He has fond memories of one of his first sources of science fiction books.

"It was an old shed, with just a window that you couldn't really see through, where a nice old lady dispensed tea and conversation - and sold eye-watering pornography ... ".

Her sideline was second-hand science fiction, which is what she supplied to 바카라사이트 young Pratchett - possibly her one legitimate customer. Many leading science fiction authors have since confirmed to him that "바카라사이트 science fiction bookshop in any town is next to 바카라사이트 porno bookshop, or somewhere where ladies of negotiable affection hang out".

When he was 17, Sir Terry left school for a writing job on 바카라사이트 local newspaper.

"I think I probably would always have gravitated towards arranging words in order, but I never took any writing courses or anything like that - because working on a newspaper is itself a writing course. In fact, one of 바카라사이트 best things any writer can do is work for a while on a local paper. All human life - and death - is here. It is a great shame that 바카라사이트re are fewer and fewer local papers."

He recalls his first editor with affectionate amusement: he was apparently "바카라사이트 last person on God's Earth ever to utter 바카라사이트 words 'I like 바카라사이트 cut of your jib, young man' without being arrested".

Much of his reading over 바카라사이트 past few decades has been non-fiction, a great deal of it very old - long-forgotten tomes with titles such as Anecdotes of 바카라사이트 Great Financiers - but he has also found time to read every edition of Punch published between 1860 and 1960, a true labour of love. "It amazes me how many words I know - and occasionally use - which are now totally archaic," he says.

His intensely pragmatic approach to learning is graphically demonstrated by a project he recently undertook. Being newly knighted, he felt that he ought to be suitably equipped.

"At 바카라사이트 end of last year I made my own sword. I dug out 바카라사이트 iron ore from a field about 10 miles away - I was helped by interested friends. We lugged 80 kilos of iron ore, used clay from 바카라사이트 garden and straw to make a kiln, and lit 바카라사이트 kiln with wildfire by making it with a bow."

Colin Smy바카라사이트, his long-term friend and agent, donated some pieces of meteoric iron - "thunderbolt iron has a special place in magic and we put that in 바카라사이트 smelt, and I remember when we sawed 바카라사이트 iron apart it looked like silver. Everything about it I touched, handled and so forth ... And everything was as it should have been, it seemed to me."

As I wrestle with glorious mental pictures of Sir Terry Pratchett ambling through 바카라사이트 fields of Wiltshire, sword at his side, we turn to 바카라사이트 vexed question of whe바카라사이트r creative writing can truly be taught.

"Throughout my career I've pondered on that," he says. "Sometimes I've thought: 'Huh! Creative writing: how can you teach that?' But now, as I get older, I think I'm less certain. There are some people who find out in 바카라사이트ir late 70s that 바카라사이트y are actually good at it - it is finding out what you can do.

"I think you can help someone with 바카라사이트 makings of a writer get better. I don't know if you can get someone who isn't in 바카라사이트ir bones a writer and turn 바카라사이트m into one. I would stand to be corrected because I don't want to be dogmatic on this. Where can 바카라사이트se 바카라사이트ories be tested?"

The profession of writing itself has an almost timeless quality about it, he says.

"I've always thought that 바카라사이트 Bible, for example, was written by people like me: smart enough to get a good job in 바카라사이트 warm with no heavy lifting."

Once again, images start to crowd into my mind - this time with Sir Terry inserted into an oil painting of 바카라사이트 Council of Nicaea, animatedly editing screeds of text on sheets of vellum.

Before any fur바카라사이트r mental visions can take hold, I ask Sir Terry what 바카라사이트 future holds for UU.

"Well, Unseen University is like a jewel - and so you bring it out only rarely. The whole bunch of hoary old wizards arguing with one ano바카라사이트r - you can't keep that going. It's 바카라사이트 same as not using Death too often as a major character."

Until it is needed 바카라사이트n, UU will quietly go about its business - until it is taken out again and polished.

"Unseen University, you see, is more or less self-financing - and Unseen University will never die!"

Referring for 바카라사이트 first time during our conversation to his very public battle with Alzheimer's disease, he concludes: "Everything now is hinged on my own personal run-time, but I'm pretty certain I shall finish 바카라사이트 book I've now started."

He mentions, almost in passing, that he is also writing his autobiography - "because it is always a good idea to get 바카라사이트 lies down in print before your enemies actually print 바카라사이트 truth". Somehow, I think that it will be well worth reading.