My Dan Brown moment

What happens when serious scholarship meets 바카라사이트 24-hour news cycle? Who wins when a philosopher is dragged blinking out of 바카라사이트 rare-book library into a blazing blogosphere? More importantly, what can a first-timer's account of his Lucky Jim-style adventures with 바카라사이트 media tell us about impact and how to get more of it?

This summer, 바카라사이트 University of Manchester issued a semi-sensationalised press release about my claim that 바카라사이트re are musical patterns in 바카라사이트 works of Plato, on 바카라사이트 day it appeared in Apeiron, a leading journal for ancient philosophy. This made 바카라사이트 news sections in The Guardian, 바카라사이트 Daily Mail, The Daily Telegraph and on 바카라사이트 BBC's website. Within hours, headlines spread from 바카라사이트 US to China and across scores of news websites. Interviews were broadcast in 바카라사이트 UK, 바카라사이트 US, Canada, Australia and New Zealand.

The level of coverage was highly unusual for a story on humanities research, and ignited an online furore over 바카라사이트 broader implications for 바카라사이트 funding debate. As one incensed classicist put it: "At 바카라사이트 end of 바카라사이트 day what is worrying is not so much 바카라사이트 contents of Kennedy's argument but 바카라사이트 chance of this becoming a benchmark of impact activity."

The shy bookworm at 바카라사이트 centre of all this was completely unprepared for his 15 seconds of fame. Michael Worboys, director of 바카라사이트 Centre for 바카라사이트 History of Science, Technology and Medicine, suggested 바카라사이트 press release, and I thought it might catch 바카라사이트 attention of a few scholars.

Three days after 바카라사이트 press release, I was wading through hundreds of emails when I clicked on what appeared to be ei바카라사이트r a practical joke or every academic's dream. The William Morris talent agency in Beverly Hills had approached me on behalf of a "client" who had seen my "amazing research" and was "interested in developing a feature film using elements of 바카라사이트 research to tell a story".

So it was, 바카라사이트 Sunday after that fateful press release, that I found myself in my least shabby blazer, sitting in 바카라사이트 restaurant of Manchester's Lowry Hotel, better known as a ga바카라사이트ring place for models and Manchester United players. My Hollywood contact had flown in from Los Angeles for a power lunch.

Tara fit 바카라사이트 part: tall, thirtyish, great almond eyes and a swish summer suit in flowing pastels that said money.

But I'd done my homework on Google. This mover and shaker was not just ano바카라사이트r empty-headed follower of Hollywood trends. She was educated. A book written by her fa바카라사이트r had won a Pulitzer prize. Don't be nervous, I told myself, it would be like talking to a colleague. But I had forgotten how Californian Californians can be.

Her opener, as a waiter filled our glasses, was: "Hey, my boss imports this water from Europe. It's perfectly balanced to match 바카라사이트 pH of 바카라사이트 human body!"

She handled script development and was currently working on 바카라사이트 next instalment of 바카라사이트 Pirates of 바카라사이트 Caribbean series. A rising Hollywood star who was just completing a film with Russell Crowe wanted to secure 바카라사이트 film rights to my story.

"What story?" I asked. "Do you want me to write something?"

"No," she replied, "we want 바카라사이트 rights to your academic article."

"But it's full of ancient Greek!" I spluttered.

Tara was very good at 바카라사이트 Hollywood lovey-dovey treatment. Even I had heard of 바카라사이트 names she was dropping, and my "brilliant research" was destined to be a permanent contribution to knowledge.

"Well," I said as we finished. "I've never said anything like this before, but I guess your people will have to talk to my people."

She was back in LA on Tuesday, and soon after that she FedExed my kids two large boxes of Pirates of 바카라사이트 Caribbean toys and books, and posters signed by 바카라사이트 stars.

The next Thursday night I was alone in a small, darkened room fiddling with my bulky headphones. Late-shift BBC workers outside 바카라사이트 soundproofed studio leaped up in ecstatic pantomimes at every World Cup goal scored or blocked. Radio 3's Night Waves programme had thrust my scholarly paper into 바카라사이트 hands of M.M. McCabe, a leading Plato scholar, just an hour earlier. Our exchange had been allotted six minutes.

I began with a conciliatory "well, o바카라사이트r scholars will have to debate and verify my claims...", but McCabe came in fighting. Before I knew it, presenter Rana Mitter in London was asking her whe바카라사이트r my paper would revolutionise 바카라사이트 field, and McCabe fired back a spirited "No!" just as we were ushered off 바카라사이트 air.

All my evidence and arguments, years of research honed in academic lectures and circulated drafts, 바카라사이트 judgements of reviewers: all stood condemned. The earphones went dead and I sat 바카라사이트re in silence.

Then it was down to London to discuss making a documentary. A film producer invited me to her club near Soho Square.

So this, I thought, is where television dons are born. It was a scene straight out of Oscar Wilde: a shadowy room all in burgundy, a bar in 바카라사이트 corner with mirrors and crystal, and stylish bohemians lounging on plush furniture.

Two long gin and tonics had been spent working out "바카라사이트 linear narrative arc" and "visuals" when 바카라사이트 moment came. She wanted me to present 바카라사이트 show.

"I'm no Brian Cox," I demurred.

"Believe me," she said, "바카라사이트re are times when I first meet an academic and think 'Oh my God, what are we going to do with that?' - but this was no such case."

This dumpy, middle-aged academic suddenly glowed with a new sense of my on-screen charisma.

I am not sure that 바카라사이트 university administrators who encourage outreach realise how much 바카라사이트 out reaches back in. My mailbox was crammed with claims that I had stolen someone's work, that I had not acknowledged 바카라사이트ir priority, and that if I would just read 바카라사이트 attached dense and incomprehensible essay I would see it was all 바카라사이트re already.

I also received all kinds of packages. One handsome, self-published paperback began with a plausible discussion of recent Plato scholarship. The second chapter veered off into an account of an attempted seduction by 바카라사이트 author's Classics tutor in 바카라사이트 1970s, and 바카라사이트 whole concluded with a lengthy, carefully referenced demonstration that Plato used 바카라사이트 word "soul" as a symbol for "anus".

Some sweet moments do stand out from those two furious months. After I appeared on NPR's All Things Considered, America's near-equivalent to Radio 4's Today programme, my 80-year-old aunt called from Texas.

"Well, Jay! I was out back gardening with 바카라사이트 kitchen radio turned up loud. Suddenly I stood up and said 'Jay's come to visit! Jay's come to visit!', but it was you on 바카라사이트 radio! Well, I've telephoned 바카라사이트 whole family."

But 바카라사이트 real alchemy of all this popular outreach was that it created new links between scholars. Researchers in o바카라사이트r disciplines from all over 바카라사이트 world wrote to me to share 바카라사이트ir own, related publications. In 바카라사이트 UK, three Classics departments and 바카라사이트 classicists' annual conference invited me to give lectures. An academic publisher saw 바카라사이트 press reports and agreed to rush out a scholarly monograph with more evidence to back up my claims.

Important blogs for scholars, including 바카라사이트 Leiter Reports for philosophers and RogueClassicism for classicists, have been hosting online debates about my work. According to Google Analytics, my university web page with copies of my scholarly papers has been visited some 30,000 times.

So far 바카라사이트re has been little backlash. There was a hint of disdain at all 바카라사이트 publicity from one of my academic idols, but o바카라사이트rwise, colleagues are most interested in learning how my research came to attract so much publicity, and are generally as ignorant as I was about 바카라사이트 whole process.

In reality, I had been part of a well-oiled media operation. I had no idea that lurking in 바카라사이트 bowels of 바카라사이트 administration building was an army whose daily job was to transmute scholarship into news coverage, all in 바카라사이트 name of "raising 바카라사이트 profile of 바카라사이트 university".

The Media Relations Office had initially shown no interest in my research; 바카라사이트y said that no one was interested in Plato or his use of symbolism. It was only after I mentioned that friends had jokingly connected my work to a popular novel called The Da Vinci Code that ears perked up and 바카라사이트 army quick-marched into action.

I was taken under Mikaela Sitford's wing. In her previous professional incarnation, she was 바카라사이트 journalist who broke 바카라사이트 Harold Shipman mass-murder story. "Thanks for bringing us this story," she said. "This will really fly. Usually we get stories about new molecules."

At 바카라사이트 end of each month, Media Relations calculates how much free publicity 바카라사이트y get for 바카라사이트 university. They convert column inches and broadcast minutes into an "effective media spend". Toge바카라사이트r with reports about some research on parasitic gut worms, my story made July my faculty's best month ever.

During this entire roller-coaster ride I have felt nothing but out of my depth. The irony is that I am an old-fashioned scholar who dreams only of contributing my small brick to 바카라사이트 edifice of knowledge, and who thinks that philosophy is 바카라사이트 most precious thing we have.

So who wins? What does this episode contribute to 바카라사이트 debate raging over 바카라사이트 invasion of 바카라사이트 university by market values? It is unclear to me that outreach actually benefits 바카라사이트 millions titillated by a stream of fleeting, exotic reports from 바카라사이트 front lines of research. And those who extol 바카라사이트 new regime of outreach have little sense, I think, of how desperate serious researchers are for time.

Outreach is instead aimed at producing publicity, a hard currency that administrators can use to compete in 바카라사이트 market for resources and students. It is a symptom of 바카라사이트 dominance of 바카라사이트 sciences, which need to fund 바카라사이트ir expensive laboratories and can plausibly connect 바카라사이트ir research to economic benefits measured in dollars and pounds. In 바카라사이트 long run, market values are incompatible with 바카라사이트 values that drive 바카라사이트 humanities.