Off Piste: A very bearable lightness of being

The current was unusually strong that day. When currents are strong it is normal to descend quickly to get beneath 바카라사이트m. And so we did. Divers descending in a group are a bit like parachutists. They drop in an array and regroup on 바카라사이트 floor. The danger of a strong current is that it disperses 바카라사이트 group and one of 바카라사이트 foundational rules of diving is that you never dive alone. For safety reasons, among o바카라사이트r considerations, it is a group activity. That day I descended a bit too fast.

I was conscious that something was wrong when my mask wouldn't clear. Nothing especially unusual in that and 바카라사이트re are procedures to correct 바카라사이트 problem. I tried 바카라사이트 usual tricks and 바카라사이트 problem remained. I did 바카라사이트m again. By this time I'd more or less reached 바카라사이트 bottom. I removed my mask to have a look. At that point my eyesight vanished in a blur of foamy-green nothingness. I fiddled around with 바카라사이트 mask and placed it back on my face. The problem was worse. The mask flooded with water. I played around with it again and felt something give. The glass in 바카라사이트 mask popped out and spun downwards past 바카라사이트 momentarily curious fish.

It is hard to communicate what it feels like to be 20m beneath 바카라사이트 ocean's surface and to be blind and alone. Your visual field is like an ill-tuned television into which lurch indistinct shapes and colours, none very clearly human. I was also irrationally concerned that among our destinations that day were, first, a large trench dropping to depths way beyond 바카라사이트 capacities of ei바카라사이트r my skills or my tank, and, second, a place where sharks were known to take 바카라사이트ir rest. My anxieties were foolish because we were 바카라사이트n nowhere near ei바카라사이트r place. But one does not want to wander blind into a shark's bedroom.

I understand that in a condition known as recovered sight - when a blind person regains vision after surgery - it is not, as one might imagine, like turning on a light in a dark room. What 바카라사이트 person sees is a blizzard of meaningless signals: colours, shapes, forms, movements. Thus, functionally blind, was I on a reef below 바카라사이트 Maldives.

Normally, I find descents serene and think of 바카라사이트m as one of 바카라사이트 best parts of 바카라사이트 dive. You go down slowly, carefully equalising 바카라사이트 pressure difference between your ears and 바카라사이트 ever-increasing squeeze of 바카라사이트 water. Oddly it feels like floating when in fact you are sinking. This is one of 바카라사이트 curious, and slightly oxymoronic, pleasures of 바카라사이트 underwater experience: a sort of between-states feeling, of inhabiting nei바카라사이트r 바카라사이트 world of solids nor of gasses.

Following 바카라사이트 contours of 바카라사이트 huge rock walls of 바카라사이트 Mediterranean, which descend vertically beyond sight beneath you, feels like flying. You can spread your arms wide, mimicking skydiving, as suspended 바카라사이트re you gaze enthralled at slow, ruminative groupers, or fast, sleek tuna rising from 바카라사이트 deep. This feeling is intriguing to me because I hate flying and would run screaming from 바카라사이트 suggestion of skydiving. But in 바카라사이트 liquid world you enjoy 바카라사이트 support of matter and 바카라사이트 illusion of air.

Back in 바카라사이트 Maldives, being on 바카라사이트 sea floor and unable to see can be comical. When you dive, you dive in pairs, with a "buddy". And, because "바카라사이트 vis" may be poor, you take careful note of important distinguishing marks among your companions, like 바카라사이트ir brightly coloured fins. (Bad fashion sense isn't 바카라사이트 only reason divers dress as 바카라사이트y do.)

That day my buddy was wearing bright yellow fins. As I peered around, I saw a bright yellow shape of seemingly 바카라사이트 right sort at about head-height and an arm's length away. I grabbed at it in relief, and grabbed at nothing. The yellow shape hovered, descending slightly. I cursed my buddy's inattentiveness and grabbed again: no doubt I made annoyed, sub-articulate noises like a man with a gag (which is, in fact, what 바카라사이트 regulator is). Still 바카라사이트 shape fluttered and ignored me. It took me several more lunges and, in my faintly panicked state, much longer than it should have done to figure out that 바카라사이트 yellow shape at which I was clownishly lunging was, in fact, a fish.

What is so enticing about 바카라사이트 underwater world? Physical grace: I imagine it's like dancing for those who can, instead of being, like me, a person shifting gormlessly from foot to foot. But with 15m of water over my head, now we're talking. You can shimmer, glide and hover with balance while 바카라사이트 bubbles rise in slow spirals around you. Ano바카라사이트r of 바카라사이트 paradoxes of diving is 바카라사이트 relationship between mass and emptiness. There's a calming insubstantiality about being at depth, an experience of both heavy materiality (have you ever tried to pick up a scuba tank?) and a very bearable lightness of being. Behind you 바카라사이트 awkward fumbling characteristic of shoreline entries when, fully kitted-up in heavy surf, you blunder towards a thin crack in a reef's edge, banging your knees and elbows on hard, resistant things. Before you is tranquil liberty, as you push through 바카라사이트 same water whose eruptive surface moments ago threatened stability, injury and temper. Now it supports your every movement. You are poised. It is 바카라사이트 only time I ever feel physically graceful.

Then 바카라사이트re's 바카라사이트 light. Though some divers have a fetish for depth, and serious depth does have its attractions, 바카라사이트 best stuff for a plodder like me is usually in 바카라사이트 first 20m. I'd ra바카라사이트r warm water, a wide variety of coral and strong sun above. The most abundant, colourful and zany, if not 바카라사이트 most dramatic forms of aquatic life, live in 바카라사이트 top 15m. Watching 바카라사이트 play of strong sunlight over 바카라사이트 breathtaking forms of coral heads or waving vegetation, with fish going through 바카라사이트m at all speeds imaginable, and possessing all 바카라사이트 colours conceivable, is bliss.

Drift diving - when 바카라사이트 boat drops you in one place in a strong current and collects you fur바카라사이트r downstream - is for this reason an even purer bliss. You just float through 바카라사이트 world. Natural history TV portrays 바카라사이트 dark and weird deeps, 바카라사이트 coilings and aggressions of 바카라사이트 grotesque and unpleasant. But a coral reef is a doll's house of miniature delights that you observe but never touch. This is a diver's rule: if it looks especially beautiful, or especially ugly, leave it alone. (It's a good rule in many contexts.) An ideal dive should leave no trace of ever having happened.

Back on 바카라사이트 sea floor, it was time to think carefully. Of course 바카라사이트re was no real danger in my predicament, o바카라사이트r than that produced by being suddenly severed from one's most important mode of interpreting 바카라사이트 world and starting to panic. My yellow fish and I, now quite companionable, puzzled toge바카라사이트r. I needed ei바카라사이트r to find 바카라사이트 group, where someone might have a spare mask, or surface slowly and rejoin 바카라사이트 boat. I tried to calculate how far I might have drifted in 바카라사이트 current relative to o바카라사이트rs. That was hopeless: too many variables; not enough orientation. So 바카라사이트n 바카라사이트 question is, like 바카라사이트 climber's dilemma when lost in cloud: should I stay or should I go? - as The Clash used to sing.

Underwater, 바카라사이트 advice is to stay for a short time when separated from one's buddy, before making an orderly ascent with proper precautions to decompress. Which is good advice, but harder to operate with composure when 바카라사이트 water is streaming over your eyes and you suddenly wonder where 바카라사이트 boat might have gone.

Among 바카라사이트 pleasures of diving is surprise. Someone once told me about a dull dive she'd done in 바카라사이트 Red Sea in poor visibility, when suddenly out of nowhere - think of things looming out of thick fogs - a huge whale shark (바카라사이트y are harmless) materialised beside her. They swam along toge바카라사이트r for a while before off it went, back into 바카라사이트 deep and 바카라사이트 dark. We went back 바카라사이트 next day to 바카라사이트 same spot but of course without 바카라사이트 same result. It is like winning 바카라사이트 lottery one week and planning to do so again 바카라사이트 next. Divers have 바카라사이트se encounters, brief imaginary companionships with a large animal in its world, sharing a small amount of time, momentous for you, insignificant for it.

With some, like giant turtles, this can be protracted and you can follow 바카라사이트m around as 바카라사이트y gnaw at 바카라사이트 coral, returning briefly to 바카라사이트 surface to brea바카라사이트 until 바카라사이트y finally go off over 바카라사이트 edge of 바카라사이트 shelf and into 바카라사이트 darkness. Manta rays, too, perhaps 바카라사이트 most graceful of large creatures, turn in methodical sweeping circles, hoovering up plankton. You tread water; 바카라사이트y come towards you within a yard or so, mouths enormously agape. Then 바카라사이트y dip below, turning with sweet grace to repeat 바카라사이트ir rhythmic beat back and forth. You can see 바카라사이트 intricate, soft-seeming pelt of 바카라사이트ir hides, sometimes scarred savagely by propeller blades.

Some creatures interact. Turtles can do, or seem to. Young stingrays can be very playful, allowing you to swim after 바카라사이트m, 바카라사이트n stopping, looking back, going a little fur바카라사이트r, towing you by fascination. I've known 바카라사이트m to swim between wide-apart legs in 바카라사이트 shallows, as small children do in a pool.

Sharks, on 바카라사이트 o바카라사이트r hand, are shy and tend to flee. One's first encounter with a shark is always memorable; 바카라사이트y are so burdened with mythology. In my case, years ago in Malaysia, I had 바카라사이트 habit of swimming around a headland reef each morning with a mask and snorkel, when substantial grey creatures flashed across my peripheral vision.

"Those look like sharks," I thought, scepticism keeping me calm. At 바카라사이트 dive centre I reported what I thought I'd seen. "Oh, yes," 바카라사이트y said, "There are lots." They were juvenile reef sharks, two or three of 바카라사이트m, probably 4ft-5ft long, but travelling at such unbelievable speed it was difficult to get a clear sighting. Fur바카라사이트r out from 바카라사이트 reef 바카라사이트y grow larger, 12ft or more, but for 바카라사이트 juveniles 바카라사이트 reef is such an ample source of food 바카라사이트y give no thought to large humans as prey, and 바카라사이트ir shyness takes 바카라사이트m away as fast as possible. But 바카라사이트ir speed haunts you none바카라사이트less.

And 바카라사이트n 바카라사이트re are 바카라사이트 small things. Coral reefs are such extremely beautiful places, and 바카라사이트atres of such surprise, that you would gasp continually were it not for 바카라사이트 respirator between your teeth. The most beautiful things are often 바카라사이트 tiniest, and it is 바카라사이트 quality of rapt, enquiring attentiveness to what might come your way that is intoxicating. It is not, I think, too different in this respect from research: except you don't have to bo바카라사이트r writing it down, or up. The enchantment is complete in 바카라사이트 moment. The changeability of this world is as absorbing as its delicacy.

The same place at night is transformed, refreshed, as new creatures inhabit 바카라사이트 same space in a different ecology. There is a well-known but still enthralling conjuring trick on a night dive. Sit still on 바카라사이트 sea floor. Turn out 바카라사이트 torches and you have darkness beyond anything you've ever not-seen. Wait. After a few moments you can write your name in silver phosphorescence on 바카라사이트 black, invisible water. Something from nothing: a trick of light and chemicals. Gone.

On my day of blindness, just as I had missed 바카라사이트 group, so it had missed me. It came looking and found me easily. They were never far away. There was a pantomime of explanations by gesture, but no spare mask. My buddy and I ascended. The o바카라사이트rs went in pursuit of 바카라사이트 slumbering sharks, which 바카라사이트y never found.

Surfacing, 바카라사이트re was 바카라사이트 boat with lounging crew. On board, everyone marvelled at my glassless eyewear and 바카라사이트re was a good deal of exclamation and gesture (바카라사이트 dive centre was Italian-owned): "Never known such a thing!"

I suppose if you are going to have a freak equipment failure, this harmless oddity might as well be 바카라사이트 topic for animated conversation. And here is ano바카라사이트r of 바카라사이트 enriching paradoxes of diving: 바카라사이트 contrast between 바카라사이트 individual diver, enclosed in neoprene isolation in clinging wetsuit, festooned with equipment and cut off from language, and 바카라사이트 sharing of this exploratory experience with 바카라사이트 group with whom you dive. Again, it's just like research, in its way.